The whole international pandemic thing that’s going down forced the 2020 March Madness to be cancelled. Or so you thought.
The NCAA is skipping this year’s tournament at all levels, but /r/CollegeBasketball has sponsored its own alternative Men’s Division I tournament: Reddit March Madness. Streamed exclusively on YouTube and executed with a college basketball video game from almost 15 years ago, this year’s March Madness is sure to be unpredictable and full of really dumb turnovers.
Nothing But Nylon is providing the exclusive* coverage of the event from the bedroom of our headquarters. Don’t miss any of the real* quotes and bone-breaking analysis that you’ll only find here because of how exclusive* this content is.
* = this means you can’t sue me
Reddit NIT Confirmed Fixed, Proving You Haven’t Seen It All
Reddit March Madness has taken the world by storm, with tens and tens of people from all over the globe tuning in for live broadcasts on YouTube for the first round, and a huge number expected to follow along moving forward.
It prompted a virtual version of the NIT, the bitter older sibling of the NCAA Tournament that used to be the pretty one when they were young, but as the years went on, it couldn’t keep up in other avenues as its beauty faded. Much like the NIT in real life, not very many people were paying attention, but some were really just that desperate for any form of basketball, again, much like anyone who would watch the NIT normally (myself very much included).
This all came to a crashing halt when /u/heybbuwantsumfuk revealed to /r/CollegeBasketball that the outcome of the Wichita State-Syracuse game from the second round of the Reddit NIT was in question. It appeared that with 21.7 seconds left in the game, the tournament organizer, /u/ChadKroger, entered the simulation, switched to control Syracuse, which led by three at that point, and sabotaged the Orange, securing Wichita State’s advancement.
In the comments of the post, further investigation found that this wasn’t the only instance of tomfoolery in the early rounds of the Reddit NIT. /u/Quidster4040, who was helping with graphics confirmed that /u/ChadKroger also entered two other games from the tournament and had proceeded to delete the account upon questioning.
THIS IS ALL TRUE!!!!!!!!!1!!1!!!
I bet you thought you’d seen it all, huh? It was almost the end of 2019, you’ve seen some crazy stuff in your life: the Great Recession, that one time in the grocery store, Korea. You thought nothing else could surprise you. Nothing else could make you rub your eyes and scratch your head because you couldn’t believe what was in front of you.
But here we are, folks. We’re stuck in our houses as there is a highly-contagious and sometimes-deadly virus out there, every sport is basically cancelled, and multiple people are not only putting on a virtual NIT, but the dude doing it, fixed it. For real. This is the world right now.
Did you think this is how your March would end? No, it isn’t, and that’s proof that you have not even come close to seeing it all.
How does one write satirically about something so outside it sounds like you made it up?
You don’t. You don’t have to. You point and laugh because that shit is already funny.
Let this be a mark in history that anyone in the future came look back at in case they were wondering how civilization was getting along in the early part of 2020.
Part of the proceeds from the sale of each #RedditMarchMadness t-shirt will go toward helping those in the basketball community affected by COVID-19. We will be partnering with non-profits like the Give and Go Foundation on the effort. If you know of a worthy group that could use some extra funds, please reach out.