Raymond Tortuga’s Men’s college Basketball Awards 2020-21
Since the tournament ended with Baylor’s demolition of Gonzaga, the world has been waiting on bated breath for the...
Satire
Overweight Man Explains Why Women’s Basketball Players Don’t Need Big Lifty Things
John Smith, a bland replica of the same American over and over, was disgusted when he saw the poor...
Full-Grown Adult Man Who Is Paid to Talk about Unpaid Work Complains about Unpaid Workers’ Unhappiness
As hundreds of unpaid workers are traveling to Indiana in the middle of a pandemic to do work for...
New York Liberty Named Most Adorable WNBA Franchise
The New York Liberty finally won something! This week, the WNBA announced one of its oldest franchises as its...
Tim Miles Glasses Amputated After Freak Fall
Basketball analyst Tim Miles had his glasses amputated from his face Wednesday following a freak fall that broke his...
Scott Drew Arrested for Murder Again, Says K-State was Already Dead
Baylor men’s basketball head coach and wax-statue impersonator Scott Drew has been arrested on first-degree murder changes for the...
NCAA Names New Basketball Inventor
Your new basketball inventor is here! In December, the FBI unveiled documents that proved James Naismith committed serious NCAA...
Utah Jazz Change Name to Utah Classic County
The Utah Jazz will change their name to the Utah Classic Country effectively immediately, the team announced. The move...
James Naismith Has Basketball Inventor Title Vacated
James Naismith will have his inventor of basketball title vacated following a pay-for-play scheme uncovered during his time as...
Space Jam Could Have Been Fixed
The game in Space Jam that secured the safety of the Looney Tunes had some suspicious circumstances surrounding it,...