The whole international pandemic thing that’s going down forced the 2020 March Madness to be cancelled. Or so you thought.
The NCAA is skipping this year’s tournament at all levels, but /r/CollegeBasketball has sponsored its own alternative Men’s Division I tournament: Reddit March Madness. Streamed exclusively on YouTube and executed with a college basketball video game from almost 15 years ago, this year’s March Madness is sure to be unpredictable and full of really dumb turnovers.
Nothing But Nylon is providing the exclusive* coverage of the event from the bedroom of our headquarters. Don’t miss any of the real* quotes and bone-breaking analysis that you’ll only find here because of how exclusive* this content is.
* = this means you can’t sue me
Reddit March Madness First Round – 13 Vermont 72, 4 Louisville 69
FIRST UPSET FIRST UPSET FIRST UPSET FIRST UPSET FIRST UPSET
Basketball fans everywhere are having flashbacks to 2011, and it’s not because “Rolling in the Deep” just came on the radio: LOUISVILLE WAS UPSET IN THE FIRST ROUND AS A NO. 4 SEED BY A MID-MAJOR ON A GAME-WINNING THREE!
It happened in 2011 when Demonte Harper pulled Morehead State ahead of the Cardinals with a dagger triple with 4.2 seconds remaining.
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In 2020, it was Everett Duncan of Vermont who did the honors.
“There are several people named Duncan on this team for some reason,” Duncan said. “That’s first and last names. I’m sick of it. I want to stand out. I want to be my own man. I want to be the top Duncan of Vermont.
“I think I accomplished that tonight.”
But the night wasn’t just about Everett Duncan becoming the Duncan of Vermont. It was also about Louisville failing miserably.
The Cardinals had an up-and-down year while remaining toward the top of the polls and ACC. But head coach and man who definitely owns at least one iguana Chris Mack and his team couldn’t capitalize in the postseason, unable to win a single game in the ACC Tournament or Reddit March Madness this season.
“A lot of people have wondered why my ears appear to be running from my face and my eyes look like my soul left my body years ago,” Mack said. “It’s because of performances like tonight.”
The defense wasn’t good enough, he said, pointing specifically to Vermont’s 44 percent shooting from the field and a double-double from Catamounts center Daniel Giddens.
Giddens scored 16 points with 15 rebounds, by far the greatest game the graduate student, who entered the game averaging 3.4 points per game this season, has ever played in his life.
“Holy shit,” he said after the game. “Holy fucking shit.”
Vermont will face the No. 5 seed BYU in the second round. Be sure to follow along with Nothing But Nylon’s comprehensively exclusive* coverage of the 2020 Reddit March Madness.